Dear and loving friend, Morgan

So it’s been a few weeks and I think that I am finally able to put into words what I am feeling.  Here goes.

     I understand that one day we will all be taken from this world.  We all know this is the truth.  Some people wonder why the Lord takes people so young.  How is it fair?  A lot of people get angry by this.  Most of us just sit stunned and shocked… sad. 

     Most of us Army friends were able to attend the memorial service or the funeral for our dear sweet friend Morgan.  I was able to attend her funeral since I am stationed in California.  I was amazed as her last commander got up and shared almost all of my personal thoughts and feelings as if she was in my head.  They were the same feelings that we all seemed to share about our great friend. 

     I always told her she was like an Amazon: this tall gorgeous woman that could beat you up.  And she really was and she really could.  She was the kind of person that could roll out of bed in sweats and pull her hair back in a messy ponytail and still be gorgeous.   That still bugs me LOL 

      She made a record in the Army for being the first Military Intelligence branch female to become a level 4 Modern Army Combatives Program instructor.  After hearing her stories of the level 3 and 4 training, I decided not to do more than level 2 J (I’m currently only level 1).

     She loved everyone and never thought of payment for her kindness.  That was just the way she was.  She didn’t do the things she did for recognition, she just did them because she cared.  When I first met Morgan, I was a Specialist and she was a Sergeant.  I had just started having medical problems with the nerves in my arms.  She overheard my conversation and tactfully pulled me aside.  She apologized for “putting herself in my business” but gave me some great advice.  It made me feel good, though I was a little confused that someone who didn’t really know me was concerned for my well being.  She remembered ever detail of everyone that she talked with.  Every time I saw her she would ask about my arms and my son, etc.

     She would encourage me in all things I tried or wanted to try.  I did my first half marathon in November 2010.   I was excited that she was going to do it with me.  Unfortunately, she got in a car accident the night before and decided sleeping off the aches was the best decision for her.  But she encouraged me to do my best and that she was happy for me.   She helped me with running in my PT test.  We ran and she rambled for 18 minutes about every book that she had read in the month or two.   She distracted me enough that I did a great run. J

     She taught me, and many others, in combatives.  She invited a few of us from the class over for lunch.  She never took “no” for an answer. J She had concocted these amazing cheese stuffed pork chops.  She always laughed at me that I couldn’t eat a ton of food, but she never stopped trying to stuff me full: yogurt, apple, pork chops, drink… “hey you want ice cream?” No.  No I don’t want ice cream. J We would take turns making cookies, cupcakes and even leftovers.  And she would never turn down my homemade spicy pickles.  She said they tasted like her grandma’s.

     My friends all know that I had a very difficult marriage and divorce with my first husband, my son’s biological father.  There were many times that I called him to ask if he would pick up our son at the daycare because I was stuck in a training that I couldn’t get away from.  I wouldn’t be able to pick up our son in time.   He would dodge and dodge and whine… eventually, I decided I wouldn’t ask him anymore.   I mentioned it to Morgan in my frustration.  She said that I could put her name down on the pickup list for the daycare.  Not only did she say it, but she meant it.  I called her office one day, last minute and she, without hesitation, agitation or question, said she would go get him after work.  Her only concern was that he might not like the pink car seat she had.  LOL Of course, he didn’t mind since he actually likes pink.

     She volunteered to watch him while I had an all night CQ shift.  She collected him from me at CQ and took him home.  She fed him, let him sleep in her bed, and bug her sweet dog (Graham).  She even took him with her to the early morning pregnancy PT that she led and dropped him off at school.  She would never let me pay her.  She just loved children that much.   

     The only way I could pay her was, of course, with dinner and conversatoin.  We loved Italian and Indian food.  She, of course, critiqued the Italian food and never stopped searching for the most authentic ones in the area. J  I loved that we could just sit and talk.  We talked about everything: our hopes and dreams of being the best sister, daughter and friend, the similarities and differences of our religions (Latter-day Saint and Roman Catholic), the guys that we liked at the time, our loving family members (our sisters, her nephew, my son, her want for children), our divorces, her recent paintings (for her mom) and everything else under the sun.  We laughed, cried, and then laughed at the fact we were crying.  There was never any judgment between us when we talked so we just put it all on the table.   

     She was the ideal friend.  We did not talk every week, but that’s how it is sometimes in the military.  We would get busy with our jobs and side lives.  But whenever we talked, we always picked up right where we left off, as if it were the day before.  She was the ideal Noncommissioned Officer, who truly lived and breathed the Army values.  It became a part of who she was.   She is an example for us all.  Morgan will truly be missed and we celebrate her life and good memory.  She will never be forgotten.  I certainly love you, Morgan.  Thank you for all you did and still do, even with your passing.  You will make a great angel.

Ashley

PS If you are feeling generous, please click on an ad to the right to help my family raise a little extra money. Thank you.